Defining “Gentle”
According to www.Dictionary.com, the word “Gentle” includes the meaning of:
- Kindly
- Mild and
- Easily Handled or Managed.
And oftentimes, people equivocates the word “Gentle” as being “Weak”.
Not so.
So what IS “Gentle”?
Gentle actions are tender and kind and strong. Gentle Gestures are intentional. And that is why it is also so powerful. because it is a choice, so…
CHOOSE to be.
Being gentle with others, as well as yourself, is an emotional choice. It is an intentional choice. For it is oftentimes easier to get mad, angry frustrated. It takes purposeful effort to choose a gentle approach or response instead.
How to be…
First, when you find yourself getting upset, breath in through your nose for a count of 4. Then, hold it in for a count of 4. Then breathe out through your mouth for a count of 5. When you breathe in, “say to yourself: “I choose to handle this situation (or him or her by name) gently” Then as you breathe out, state that “All is well”. Do this for a total of three to five times until you actually feel a sense of calmness within.
Next
Then ask yourself, “Why did I actually get frustrated?”
Usually it is due to one of two things:
- You didn’t feel heard or
- You think you are right.
Either way, resolve this by repeating back to the person their words.
For example, “Bob, I want to make sure that I understand your viewpoint. Would it be OK if I repeat back what you said to be sure?”
Then do so. Ask Bob: “Is that what you were saying?”
Bob will then gauge your level of accuracy and the two of you can move on from there.
These two steps allow you to truly hear what the other person is saying while you love yourself enough to purposely slow down and treat yourself better. Then you both benefit.
If you would like to learn other ways on how you can benefit from this powerful perspective, yet another way to love yourself First, Best and Always, please give me a call and make an appointment. I can be reached at 520.433.4022.
Looking Forward,
Rich
www.RichSchickel.com